


Kankinta Meilė

by AmaranthBlacktree



Category: Hetalia APH
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Blood Drinking, Drugged Sex, Insanity, M/M, Molestation, Mutilation, Rape/Non-con - Freeform, Severe Violence, Torture
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2010-10-25
Updated: 2010-10-25
Packaged: 2017-10-12 21:21:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,392
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/129207
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AmaranthBlacktree/pseuds/AmaranthBlacktree
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ivan snaps, and decides to take it out on poor Toris. Warning! Forgein Languages used, YAOI, Rape, Blood Gore, Torture, Forced ManXMan, RussLiet, severe language. Rated M for a reason!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Pradžia

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Net tie, manote, kad niekada negali jums pakenkti, gali. Net jei jie prisiekia, kad jie tave amžinai. Amžinai nėra paskutinis. Jis išnyks kaip ir praėjusį pavasarį nužudyti žiauriai šalčio žiemos gėlės. Taip yra iš meilės. Ji nėra paskutinis. (1)  
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Whimpers of pain echoed in the small room, colliding with gasps and plaintive pleas.  
Spread eagle, restrained by cords that fixed to the underside of the bed that I was laying on. My mouth and nose crushed into the silken bed sheets. I flinch as I hear the ominous whistle, bracing myself for impact.  
When the whip hits, it rips into my already shredded skin. Blood languidly dripping from the lacerations. Fire erupts in my already fevered skin, causing me to arch my back. Throwing my head to the ceiling with the force of my scream.  
A cold hand slaps my face causing my head to rip to the side. Pain shoots up my spice at the awkward position.  
They kneel before me, smiling in their insanity. Threading their fingers in my sweat and blood matted hair, cooing and laughing at my pitiable expression.  
"Was that enjoyable?" Quirking an eyebrow they wait for my reply.  
All the words freeze at the tip of my tongue. So many things I want to say, but know that if uttered, my reward would be even more stinging blows. So I keep silent, and wait.  
Anger flares in the cold corridors of their eyes. Looking into them I can see the pits of hell.  
They rip the locks of my hair still twined in their fingers in an agonizing jerk. I bite my lib, chewing it raw in my bid for silence. Hoping against hope that they are done.  
"I asked you a question Toris." They mumble through smirking lips. My eyes water as they continues to thread through my hair. Still I keep silent. The whip raises dripping with blood as they prepare to lash me a again. I close my eyes and try to wish myself away. Three stinging cords rip violently into my back, tearing into my flesh. My throat burns with the effort of trying not to scream. Salty tears spill over the lids of my eyes and my torturer tracks the trails of my shames. Grinning they tilt my head back and lick at my face, tasting my tears.  
"Why so sad Toris? Don't you enjoy my company?" They laugh cruelly before straddling my hips and scratching at my back with their nails. I buck my hips trying to get them off, encouraged by my groans of pain they dig in deeper. They claw at the cuts and peel my skin away, screams of agony rip from my throat, burning on their way out. Letting my head fall forward into the pillows, I bite down trying to control my ragged gasps of breath that mingle with the tortured screams still issuing from my throat. They haven't done anything like this before and I'm terrified of what they'll do next. Rough hands drag down my battered spine digging into the cuts even more and causing blood to pool faster at the small of my back. The shreds of cloth that is all that is left of my shirt cling to their fingers and adds stinging friction to the lacerations. They reach the band of my sleeping shorts and wiggle their fingers underneath. My breath hitches as I realize what they're about to do. A fresh wave of tears rushes back to my eyes as my shorts are slowly lowered.  
A wisp of hot air tickles my ear as they nuzzle the side of my face, my shorts are dragged down the length of my legs and are discarded. The breaths come faster as they slide their hands over my mutilated back, up my arms and along my sides. I bury my face into the pillows, screaming in my head. Panicking. They suction their mouth to my neck and begin to rove my fever skin. A new sharp pain adds to the sensory overload. Sharp teeth are gnawing at my shoulders and neck. Stretching themselves out along my body, I can feel their stiff heat pressing into me. Rolling their hips it grinds into my ass and I grip the pillow in my bid for dominance over my tears.  
This couldn't be happening. Why me? Why now? Why this?  
Wasn't it enough that I as completely under their control? A toy, a plaything, used until they grew tired of it and tossed it aside until the next day when they needed to release their tensions. Sometimes to the extent I feared I had snapped. Broken fully. But always, everyday they came up with new ways to cut me down, stunt me.  
Destroy me...  
I was yanked from my rambling by the sensation of a hand palming my thighs apart. My mind flurried as it tried to deny what was happening.  
To my horror, when they reached for me and began to stroke me...I reacted. Shame burst through my head, berating me for not controlling myself. Self-loathing reached out it's talons and clawed at my mind. I was being violated, I shouldn't be taking pleasure in it. Their hot breath distracted me for a minute as it burned at my ear.  
"You enjoy this, Toris" They sneered. I wanted to scream that I hated it, to shove them off and deny it, but my body still betrayed me as the stroking came faster and more hurried. I clawed at my mental restraints and tried to stop it, but I could feel myself slipping. A tightening coiled in my belly as the heat burned stronger with every pump of their hand. A sharp nip to my shoulder blade had me climaxing and cringing as my mind exploded with hate and shame.  
But my ordeal was far from over.   
The ties on my limbs slackened and I gasped from the pain as my back was allowed to rest.  
My mind whirred as I slowly rolled over, aware that they still straddled me. I lay there staring up into their unreadable face.  
Humor sparked behind the cloudy sheen of their mental haze. I knew they weren't done, they wouldn't stop until they felt I had been dominated thoroughly. I narrowed my eyes and glared defiantly up at them.  
Anger ignited as they registered my new expression. A large meaty hand collided with my face with a sickening crack. A shrill cry echoes in the room as I whimper in pain. A well of blood springs up in my mouth as I watch the crazy light glow in their eyes.


	2. Kankinimas

Staring out from behind the eyes that I hide behind, I watched the scene unfold. This body which betrays, tortured him. Caused him to bleed, to feel pain. He stares at me evenly, features marred slightly by pain. Just watching me.

 

I know it's wrong. I know I shouldn't.

 

But... I can't stop.

This body hides a monster, one who claims dominance. One that likes the pain it inflicts. Who enjoys the red blooming out of his body. My mental restraints keep me hostage, smuggling to stop myself.

 

The Demon laughs at my attempts. It sneers as I try to regain myself. But in the end, I'm too weak.

 

\-------------

 

I could see the shift in their eyes as they glowered down at me.

 

I hope...pray...that he wins.

 

But the icy hate slowly frosts over those violet eyes. I let out a breath I hadn't realized I'd been holding and close my eyes. Iron hands clamp over my bruised wrists and slip them back in to the restraints. The action causes the dry blood to shift, pain lances through my body as my arms are drawn tight. I grit my teeth as my back bow trying to relieve some of the tension.

 

It's a mistake to do so.

 

They hiss as our hips connect and the feral manic glint ignites their eyes further. Their hand palms slowly down their body, crisp white shirt tainted with shiny crimson of fresh blood that streams down and blots the cloth of their black pleated trousers. The white of their hand is stained with the flecks of dried blood and it smears the new on its downward trek.

 

It comes to rest on the stainless steel buckle of their belt. It winks wickedly in the light and I begin to hyper-ventilate. The room wavers as I suck back breath.

 

Cruel laughter slices through the semi-silence. A hand marbled with blood swings freely and connects with my jaw for the second time. It brings pain which I use as a focus point to even my breathing. As my eyes water my ears pick up the terrifying sound of the buckle being undone, quickly followed by the rasp of a zipper being drawn down.

 

The weight of them lifts up as they stand to discard their pants and boxers. They toy with the belt before ripping it from the loop and cracking like a whip. I flinch from the sound and they laugh with glee. Pulling tight the cords they restrain my legs once again. My cheeks burn as I lie naked for them to touch and look at freely. Shame gnaws at my mind taunting me from the sidelines with barbed words. I watch as they hesitantly step towards the bed, childish delight creeping over their face. Slowly they climb on the bed and straddle me once again.

 

Skin on skin, their icy cold flesh on mine gives me Goosebumps and as their eyes begin to glaze over it makes me nauseous. Lust clouds the pinkish purples of their eyes and they pull back slightly probing me. Shock numbs me from my core and I can only lie there and try to deny what's happening.

 

They gaze down and with a vicious shove, push into me. Pain makes me gasp, and tears leak from my eyes. Groaning softly they pull their hips back slowly before ramming hard right back into place. The immense pain tears at me and I squeeze my eyes shut. It was the worst thing I could have done. The sounds, smells, and feeling assaulted me the instant I closed them. The sweat rolling off his roiling body dripped onto my own sweaty skin, their breath heated my face with each exhale spewing foul air that stank of vodka. The rustle of cloth mixed in with the slight creaking of the bed, moving in tandem with their thrusts. The feel of our slick bodies sliding together. The slap of flesh colliding made me sick.

 

But the pain gave me focus. Burning white hot and increasing with every movement. I could feel thin rivulets of blood running down my thighs, large meaty hands bruising my wrists, and the occasional flash of pain as they chewed my shoulders into a bloody mess.

 

I t seemed to take forever but finally, they froze and released with a drawn out moan. Collapsing on top of me they looked up into my face and smiled. I glared back and watched as the icy quality melts away. Their body slackens as exhaustion rolls over them. Struggling to sit they drag themselves into an upright position. Their violet eyes slowly fill with tears and a now gentle hands dance along my body floating from injury to injury. They peer down and lock gazes with me. Tears overflow and run down their face and drip onto my own. It makes me feel better as if their tears are cleaning me of this disgusting nasty feeling.

 

"Toris!" They wail and carefully release the braces, hurling them away.


	3. Taisyklės Pasikeitė

They lurch to their feet and stumble drunkenly to the room's adjoining bathroom. Still numb from the experience I lay there and listen to what's happening, daring to hope it's over.

 

Something breaks and they curse it in rapid Russian. They appear at the doorway laden with bandages and bottles. Making their way back to the bed they drop to their knees and begin to open the bottles. My eyes trace their face wary. Their hands lift up and slowly inch toward me. I tense up as it brushes my arm. They halt for a second before delving under my shoulder and gently rolling me over. Grunting in pain, I stiffen which wasn't the best idea. Sore muscles protest against the rapid movement, and the resulting pain has tears streaming down my face. A sharp intake of breath informs me just how bad my wounds are.

 

"Oh...Toris." They moan softly, anger and horror twisting through the words.

 

I can feel their gaze on me and I hate it. Regardless of the tears that they shed for me that vile rusted feeling is beginning to rise again. Something wet and cold glides across my back, which is burning from the whip and clawing fingers. It soothes for a few seconds before a new pain begins to set in. Searing pain like a thousand tiny needles sweep across the abused area. My body seizes as they continue to rub what I now know to be peroxide over my wounds.

 

Black spots my vision before finally pulling me under. The last thing I see is a crystallized drop falling from terrified violet eyes.

 

That when I floated off...

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"Oh!"

 

A loud resounding crash, a grunt of annoyance.

 

"Oops..sorry." A whispered apology.

 

"Sush, why can't you do that elsewhere?" A just as quiet reprimand. The black was fading, not as heavy. Not as oppressive.

 

My eyelids felt like they'd been nailed shut, my limbs like sand for all the control I had over them.

 

"Look! He's moving!" A delighted giggle and a stern shush in return. But it gave me hope that I wasn't just flopping around in my own mind.

 

"Toris? Tor?" A gentle nudge to the shoulder. "Can you hear me?"

 

"Mmmmph..." I groaned. Steeling myself I forced my eyelids open.

 

Oh....not smart. Too bright! Gritting my teeth I willed my watering eyes to stay open, damned if I had to try again. Something moved to block the killer fluorescents , oh hello arm. Seems like motor control has entered the building. Huffing in a breath I heave myself up and adjust myself so I can sit on my own.

 

A wave of dizziness washed over me, and it was few minutes before I could look around without wanting to hurl. Bed. I was on a bed. Okay, Room...mine it seemed. Azure blue carpet, mahogany bookshelves, floor to ceiling windows. Yup, mine.

 

Voices. Looking around I saw the sources.

 

Raivis. Eduard. My brothers.

 

"Tor." A sighed whisper this time, a reassurance.

 

A squeal lit up from the door as a blonde fluff ball hurtled towards me. It caught it's self before it could jump on the bed. For which I was thankful.

 

"You're finally awake." Eduard said, removing his glasses and efficiently cleaning them before replacing them on his nose. His light green eyes studied my every movement before he flung himself at me.

 

Raivis hopped on the bed and snuggled in on my left, Eduard my right.

 

"How long?" I croaked, throat dry as dirt. Eduard took his time pouring a tumbler of water, when he turned back around his face was grim.

 

"19 days, 6 hours, and 10 minutes. The longest two and a half weeks of my life." He said straight faced. The only sign of his slipping composure was the shaking of his usually steadfast hands. I carefully took the glass from him and drank it down before continuing.

 

"And him?" I faltered unable to say his name. Eduard's face turned stony.

 

"On the third level, in the library. Comes out only to see you, or go to his rooms."

 

"Oh." Was all I could say. The thought of him visiting me, chilled me to the core. Sensing my disquiet Raivis snuggled harder and I leant down and kissed his shaggy mop of wheat-colored hair.

 

Eduard glanced down at his wrist watch and blanched. He beckoned Raivis out of the bed with panic marring his features. I frowned at their rush and began to express my hurt, but Eduard silenced me.

 

"Explain. Later." He breathed before darting out of the room with Raivis in tow.

 

I glanced at the door disheartened. Then I heard it. The rhythmic walk that told me too well who was coming. My blood ran cold and I scooted down the bed enough to lie down. Arranging myself in a sleeping position, I closed my eyes just as the handle on the door began to turn.

 

Heavy footfalls slapped at the heavy carpet, drawing closer to the bed. I tried to regulate my breathing but the painful pounding of my heart made it difficult.

 

The sound of a chair being plunked down sent Goosebumps crawling up my arms. Rustle of clothing, creak of the chair, then all was silent save my choppy breathing and their even draws.

 

A hand clamped onto my wrist and pulled it. I remembered to stay limp as they toyed with it.

 

"Why won't you wake, my little Toris? All you do is sleep and sleep. I want to play." They cooed. My skin tightened, that tone was the hallmark of their sadistic side.

 

Their cold hands trailed up my arms and I struggled not to flinch. It came to rest on my cheek and I could feel their stare intensifying.

 

"Sleep, little one. While you can." The honey tones dripped from their lips and fell on my ears like a cloying and sickening stench. They pressed their lips hard to my cheek and got up. I cracked my eyes just enough to watch them disappear from the room.

 

Stiffling a sob, I sat up and wiped the lingering wetness and smell from my cheek. I struggled with my gagging, chest heaving sobs, when I felt a hand rubbing my back. Yanking up, thinking they had returned I lifted my hands to defend but let them fall when I saw that it was only Eduard and Raivis back from their hiding.

 

I let myself go and tried to relax.

 

"Don't let go too much, once he finds out you're awake...he's holding a summit meeting." Eduard said, pulling me into his lap. I startled and looked into his face confused.

 

The Rules of his game have changed. It's time to re-learn how to play." He said, looking down at me.

 

I blanched at the thought, " Hell week all over again."


	4. Tai Prisimena

The clink of silverware was all that I could hear in the smallish dining room. And it was driving me slowly to the brink of madness. The tension that clouded the room was nearly palpable. Eduard was sulking in his chair barely eating , throwing angered looks at Ivan when he thought he wasn't looking, and sending me hurt looks when I looked at him. Raivis could sense it as he looked back and forth between us, shoveling Kasha and Blini in as fast as he could. Ivan seemed to be the only one who couldn't sense the unrest brewing. Digging his fork in and eating happily he would stop every once in a while to look up at me and smile. I ate as much as I could but in the end I just felt queasy.

 

Ivan had a master plan, I was sure of it. He rarely if ever ate with us, preferring to stay in his study or the library brewing over finances and estate matters. I preferred it that way too.

 

At last he finished the last of his food, smacking his lips in satisfaction and grinning cheerfully around the table. He settled back in his chair and sighed.

 

"Bihla ochin fkusna!" Ivan said. His hand extended slowly, and began to drum a tempo on the hard cedar of the table. "I was disappointed about not having Kifir, I must admit." He glanced at me quickly before latching on his gaze on Raivis. Cowering beneath the brunt of the Ivan's heavy stare he waited for the scolding he expected. But it didn't come. "Eduard, take Raivis to the supermarket in Moscow. Buy groceries, I suspect that we are low on many things." He flicked his gaze back to me for a second before pinning Eduard down. "Take your time, don't forget anything. Toris clear up, I'll be waiting in the library for you." He grinned and lifted his plate an gently set atop my own. Standing he bowed slightly to me before retreating to the upstairs.

 

"Told you," Eduard muttered, still stirring his Kasha. I rolled my eyes at him, and began to pile up the dishes. Raivis carried the glasses to the kitchen and started the water. Eduard grabbed at my shoulder, and slipped a small rectangle into my pocket. "For emergencies." He said softly. I nodded and took the remaining dishes to the sink. Raivis dutifully dunked them, passed them to me for washing while Eduard dried. Stacking them one by one, careful to check for patches of fog on the glass and buffing them, Eduard tried to prolong his leaving. But in the end he was called to Ivan's study to receive a list of things he needed to procure while in Moscow.

 

\----------

 

Eduard looked down cast as he exited the study. I looked at him questioningly, he looked up warily but shook his head in disgust and marched past. I watched him, grab Raivis by the hand and continue down the hall stopping only to look at me and mime using a phone. I nodded and walked past the study door to my room that was a few doors down. I slowly let the door open, checking the hall one last time before darting in and making my way to the closet. Slipping out the small silver rectangle from my pocket I flipped it open and scrolled down the menu items. On the phones speed dial was Eduard's number, and Feliks. I smiled at the name before muting it and slipping it into my winter coat. If Ivan ever found it in my possession, I shuddered to think of what he might do.

 

I slipped out of the slightly dampened clothes I had on and pulled on more comfortable pleated trousers and a puffed sleeve peasant shirt. Opting out of shoes I walked barefoot to the door in time to hear my name being called. Sighing I readied myself for what I considered was going to be a grueling meeting. Slipping out and down the hallway I followed the sugar-coated voice to the library door. Huffing in a breath I knocked lightly and waited for the command.

 

"Enter." Was the silkily given order. I complied immediately, knowing Ivan's temper for slowness. He glanced back at me before turning back round to his desk and scribbling on a piece of paper. I made to move to his side and begin whatever task he had for me, but a bone chilling snarl held me fast. " Don't move, Toris." He glanced up into a mirror and glared back at me. Moving a hand he pressed a button, behind me I could hear the loud click of locks sliding into place had cold sweats breaking out over my skin.

 

Not so soon, surely? I couldn't have done anything to anger him in the last three days...could I?  
Apparently so, by the scowl his reflection showed. I tried my best to stand straight, and present a united front, one free of terror that was so slowly bubbling up within me.

 

"I am a good friend, am I not Toris?" He said, sighing as he slid papers around on his desk. " I ask for very little, and take very little. So why do you not like me?" His voice dropped an octave as one hand clenched on his iron pipe shaped like a water faucet. My mouth ran dry, and I tried to choke out words around the paper texture of my lips.

 

"I didn't ask for responses, Toris." His voice light and syrupy, "Your actions have proven damning enough. You see, while you were sleeping for weeks, I had a camera installed in your room. I won't bother to tell you where, so you can just go rip it out when you leave. I wanted to know when you woke so I could greet you. About four days ago, you finally stirred for the first time. I was delighted! But when I arrived, you were still unmoved and unchanged as before. What happened Toris? Talking to your brothers wore you out too much?" He chuckled softly, each sound rolled over my skin digging into is. I blanched as he stood and faced me.

 

There was no friendly flicker behind his eyes, only a stone cold rage that burned me with its gaze. It wasn't Ivan...it was them. My hands clenched as they strolled closer, circling and leaning in slightly, puffing vodka tainted breaths of air at my sweat-soaked skin. He rested his head on my should near my ear, and drew in a breath before continuing.

 

"From then on I kept special watch, and found out your lies." His voice became soft and child like, eliciting a shudder. "Why did you lie to me, Toris? Don't you like me? I like you, you know. I like you a lot!" He swept up in front of me and looked me straight on, a mad gin marring his features as he eyed me. I stood there shaking, knowing that the doors were locked, and I had no means of escaping. My head dropped as I realized the one thing that could have saved me was not with me. The phone from earlier, still slipped away in my coat.

 

I groaned softly, shaking my head. A hand swept under my chin lifting it, hard violet eyes bored into my own and I flinched trying to get away from them. But they were holding too tight, my squirming was noticed and their mouth tightened into a vice-like grip. "And to add insult to injury," He breathed, hissing each syllable out, "You don't even pay attention when I'm talking to you. Toris...I love you, da?"  
My eyes shot to meet his, not comprehending what he was saying.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I always leave it off when it starts to get good...huh?
> 
> DUN DUN DUUUUN -shot- I apologize for the shortness of the last chapter...I promise these next ones'll make up for the epic shortness of the last chapters....
> 
> And a note: All the Russian spoken or referred to is what is called Transliteration, as you probably can't read in Cyrillic Russian I've taken the liberty of putting what it's supposed to sound like.
> 
> ...The next chapter (that I'm working on right now) is going to be a doozy, I can feel it. Last night, for some reason while role-playing as Russia, my mind was able to comprehend his thinking...and I made notes. Apparently during that conversation I played the role pretty damn convincingly, but next chapter'll be the judge, da? I'll be including warnings for it next chapter....stay tuned.
> 
>  
> 
> AM

**Author's Note:**

> Am I a horrible person for cutting it off there? Lol it's a two part story..unless someone demands more...so the next one is under construction...  
> (1) I apologize if the grammar of my Lithuanian is horrible..it isn't my first language and I'm teaching myself....sooooo yeah...lol  
> What does it mean you ask? -Translation- Even those you think that can never hurt you, can. Even if they swear that they will love you forever. Forever doesn't last. It will fade like the flowers of last spring killed by the harsh frost of winter. Such is the way of love. It does not last.  
> Bit horrible eh? lol  
> Oh! And the title means Tortured Love. So that's going to play a bit of a role in the story too....>_<; lol PLEASE Read and Review!!! Danke Shön!


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